3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
