This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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