the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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