Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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