I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
