I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
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her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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