you guys were way drunker than both of me
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize