so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Randomize