doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
