trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
You're like the curious george of whores
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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