Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
only if we run a train.
done.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Randomize
