I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
