I hope mine doesn't look like that
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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