But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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