At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
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I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
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Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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