piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Randomize
