was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
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he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
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She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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