Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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