Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
