I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
so much tequila, so little girl.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
