I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Houston, we have a blender
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
