My nipple is on Facebook.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
