rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize