if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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