Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
