This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize