All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
