I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
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The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
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I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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