You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
