____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Randomize