fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
