If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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