Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
