why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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