thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
