I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
