i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
