apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
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