why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
