I am in a vortex of obligation.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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