I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
