i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
