well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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