of course. lets lasso hookers.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
