So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
