I love black thongs
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
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