i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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