I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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