Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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