But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I could have mohawked her pubes.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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