THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
